Eldest daughter moved out into her own apartment the end of May. Things seemed to settle out a bit as she got into a routine of her own space, her own schedule and around our house there was a collective sigh. We managed to see her fairly often and she was getting the grandson through some summer activities, then suddenly school was just around the corner.
When younger daughter graduated from college mid-May, the family got together and went to the ceremony then had a family cookout. It was pretty low-key but nonetheless eldest daughter managed to put on a grumpy face and leave the ceremony early... going home and being decked out in her finest sweatpants before the rest of us even got home. The rest of the day's activities were overshadowed by the glowering woman in the sweat pants.
After that episode and the moving out, things seemed better for awhile. Eldest daughter was still doing things with some friends she'd made at work, and she seemed relatively happy. Fast forward a bit to the middle of August. I had planned a surprise birthday party for my husband to take place at our house. The idea was to get him out of the house (younger daughter and I took him to the fair) and the ruse was we were going to go home mid-afternoon to meet up with the other kids and their spouses, the grandson, etc, and cookout. Little did husband know that 80 of his closest friends were waiting for him. I'd gotten both boys roped into preparing things, a friend of the family grilled the meats, and my daughter-in-law gathered up some of the food stuff. I wanted elder daughter to feel included, so asked her to pick up the cake and help out however she could. As it turned out, she did... and she and grandson made a nice banner out of an old sheet and some spray paint.
The party went amazingly well and yes, he was surprised. As the food was being laid out, eldest daughter and grandson were first in line and I had a chance to thank her for all her help and tell her how nice the banner looked. I didn't have much time to visit then, and a short while later when I went looking for her, I was told they'd left!
I sent her a text to thank her again and mentioned I had missed getting to visit. She said she'd been getting anxious so left, which was fine, except I heard later from my son that she actually made kind of a scene and "peeled out" when she left. Not sure what was up with that.
With lots of things going on I didn't really have time to dwell on the topic... not then.
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1 comment:
without dismissing her very real issues, it does seem like she either doesn't enjoy crowds, or someone else in the family being the center of attention. Unfortunately, part of being a grown up means sucking it up and then being polite. I'm sorry!
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